These are just a few photographs I took using my Samsung S4 phone. I am really close to being able to get another DSLR. Until then, I have been using the everything out of my camera phone. I can’t really explain what inspires me. Sometimes it is the colors, the location, or the story. Here are a few taken in November of 2015.
I am as awake as this sunflower photograph I took above. It is 1:30 in the freakin morning and I want a peanut butter sandwich. So… I made one. Yesterday, I went to church, went to the gym, and then worked for six more hours. I do not understand why I am struggling with sleep???
So while I am downing my sandwich, I also want to vent for a minute. Have you ever felt really led to do something. Whether it be that you heard a church sermon (like me) or something motivated you? I felt led today to reach out to someone (who really was not a supportive friend during my divorce) and apologize to them for how hard it must have been being in the position they were. Let me explain, this person was a friend of mine (more of a childhood friend) but BEST FRIENDS with the girl that hooked up with my now x husband. It was very complicated. Anyway, long story short, I messaged her tonight and gave her a genuine apology for my anger towards her and opened the door for us to be friends again. Let us just say that it pretty much got shut in my face. I was told that we could still be friends but not close friends, that it was hard to follow people when they lived so far away, that we should not be friends if it is going to cause other people stress, etc. The response was cold, short, and very un-interested. There was not even a thanks for apologizing in there. It really made me feel like I wasted my time. I guess if nothing else, I can say that I tried.
My Canon DSLR has pretty much croaked. I made the mistake of taking it places like the beach, dog park, kennel, etc. To get it looked at/fixed it will probably cost me near what it would cost to just get another one. I have really enjoyed it and all the pictures it took! I will definitely keep it as a reminder of the travels. Next on my list to buy is definitely a camera. These flower pictures are from my last trip on my way back to Charleston, SC from Norfolk, VA to visit Jordan and Jay. I saw a small sunflower field thing off to the side of the road. I definitely pulled over and took several shots. I wish I had stayed longer because I do love these pictures. I continue to believe that my best pictures were taken from the side of the road 🙂
I am hanging in there with school. It’s really hard as I almost have dropped out on several occasions. I am tired, burned out, and extremely stressed trying to work a full time job and go to school part time. Several people advised me to find the school’s counseling services though (that are free). I recently found a very nice counselor that is going to start helping me weekly to manage money, stress, eating, and life in general. That is really the only thing keeping me going academically right now…the hope that maybe things can somehow get easier.
I really liked that tree picture above 🙂 I took it recently during the sunrise before work. I wish I had taken the other side of the tree so I could get to canvases and put them next to each other. I will have to try that with a tree sometime in the future. Anyway back to what I was saying…..
My best friend Jordan and her fiancee Jay are getting married in a week. I’m so happy for them as they make an amazing couple together. He is military, can wear a leather jacket, loves her music, and knows what it means to protect. She is tatted, loves VWs & Mustangs, enjoys acting, and can keep Jay on his toes 🙂 I wish them the best of luck. She is going to show her tatoos during her wedding, wear high heels with big hearts on them, dawn a leather jacket (as will jay) that is spray painted with words, and is getting married in a restaurant. I’m her maid of honor and I am honored to be that after being friends with her since we were fifteen.
I continue to put things in my etsy shop so eventually I will have a collection of pictures on there 🙂
I have to work the next four days on. Which means Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday I work around 38 hours. Then on Tuesday and Thursday I go to school. Wednesday is the only day I have “off” if you are not counting the amount of laundry I must do, food I must by, errands I must run, bills I must pay, etc. Think about me, as right now I am struggling.
Those random shots one takes before leaving the mall parking lot of the trees. Oh wait, I am one of the few people that stops to do that hahah. The sky looked stormy tonight! It caused the trees to look really beautiful against it though.
From December 30th 2014-January 2nd 2015 I got the opportunity to finally take four days off of work. So of course, I put my feet up, drank coffee, and had a movie marathon. NOT. hahah! I have been wanting to travel for a while and go see a good friend in Ohio named Sam.
Traveling up there I got to go through several different states. Starting in SC I drove through NC, TN, KY, and OH. It was so much fun!!! I loved TN and all the mountains that were surrounding me. For the FIRST time I:
-Drove through a mountain tunnel (and experienced my radio shutting off in it…creepy!)
– Pulled over to the side of major high ways to take pictures
-took a selfie of me and my dog (Daisy) in front of the mountains in KY
-I turned 27! And was told I am getting old (Thanks Flor lol)
I wanted to share some of the photographs I took along the way with you!!! ❤
Daisy and I wearing matching hoodies (completely un planned!!)
Sam and My cup from Spencers in OH!
I turned 27!
Sam took me to a park and just let me take pictures!!!
That is all for now! I have a lot more to edit ! ❤ Hope everyone had a save New Years and that 2015 is amazing. Oh and my facebook status on Dec 31, 2014 for my New Years resolution was:
December 31, 2014 at 11:13pm
My new years resolution is to: Love myself a great deal more. Every year I make resolutions to make myself “better.” This year, I am reversing that. My goal is to not only feel but absolutely know that I am enough. And to believe with all my that one day someone will agree with that.
Recently, I’ve found something very beautiful about trees. I keep wanting to photograph them! This picture above was taken outside my work on December 2014. It was sunrise and the sky was beautiful. There is something about dark trees against a lit up sky….
This is a mini update. I got my leave approved so I will be going to Ohio for my birthday (Dec 31st!) to visit a good friend. After working nine months and not ever seeing a four consecutive day off stretch, this is really exciting.
Right now, it looks like I am going back to college for education in January. It’s been a hard decision. I struggle between doing things I am passionate about (photography and animals) and doing a career in which I would be able to live comfortably. I don’t even want to be rich…I just want to be able to eat more than turkey sandwiches .
The stick shift didn’t work out. I thought I got the hang of it but broke it again. 😦 So my grandfather ended up helping me get a 2013 Nissan Versa AUTOMATIC that is beautiful and good on gas. It does not need any duct tape which is super exciting. I can also travel in it without feeling like it’s going to fall apart or blow away at any given moment. CANNOT EXPLAIN WHAT A RELIEF AND HOW GRATEFUL I AM.
I’ve been going to the gym more after work which is good! I don’t think about my x anywhere near as much as I used too. Every once in a while something makes me sad but there are no longer days where I cry all the way home because I miss the way things were. I honestly don’t remember the way things were or what it really felt like to not want to love those times. From where I was last December to where I am today is really amazing. I’m stronger, independent, have more self worth, have held one full time job, getting back into school, starting to date again (that’s a while different post), and am beginning to be able to balance my life better. I feel like the past several months I have been surviving. Now it’s time to actually start LIVING. 🙂
Thank you to all who have supported me, been there through my divorce, and given advice. ❤
Today, I was already bummed about having to work a half day. I mean, really, what can you get done in a HALF DAY. I decided to take my camera, grab some coffee, and head to church. Unfortunately, I never made it past the coffee. My car started making a knocking noise. Earlier that day it had been making the same noise. However, this time it got louder and then sounded like it was dying (literally). My original thought was that I must have a flat tire. Managed to drive the car into the first turn I saw which thankfully was a neighborhood and park it. Jumped out to examine tires only to see… NOTHING. Popped the hood (like I know what in the world to look for….) and could tell the engine was hot. Then put the hood back down because, well, I knew I had no idea about engines. Tried turning the car back on and although it would start and shift into gear, it would NOT move. Tried it a few more times with no results.
THANK GOD FOR A CAR PHONE CHARGER
Whenever there is an emergency, my phone is guaranteed to be dead.
I had my roommates girlfriend come pick me up. I was parked in front of one of those houses that it seemed like people just kept coming out of. There were about four cars in front and a pair of the most ferocious sounding pit bulls I’ve ever heard in my life. Like, they kept sounding like they were turning on each other. There was a dog warning sign on their yard. I wanted to yell “no shit, really?”
When my ride came I of course gather up everything out of car. Because I am stressed, I panic about where my phone is (its in my hands). Which I realize when it slips out and breaks into three pieces. Thankfully, I don’t have a flimsy iphone that breaks at the drop of a hat. My battery managed to pop out though and fall underneath my un moveable car. I literally lay flat on the ground and reach with all my might for this tiny black square. I was able to retrieve it.
Once leaving the car, I came back to the house. I had to cancel work because I could not get there. I am seriously about to be fired. So I probably need to go ahead and start a plan B, as plan A is going up in smoke. My friends have been amazing though with rides and letting me borrow their car.
I feel like I am suffocating though.
My camera,dog, and I took a walk where I photographed a lot of flowers. Here are some of the pictures below. I was happy with how a lot of them turned out.