Book Quotes I Love

Out of a list of 51 book quotes, these were some of my favorite ❤

“One must be careful of books, and what is inside them, for words have the power to change us.”
—Cassandra Clare, The Infernal Devices

“In our village, folks say God crumbles up the old moon into stars.”
—Alexander Solzhenitsyn, One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich

“She wasn’t doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together.”
—J. D. Salinger, “A Girl I Knew”

“I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart; I am, I am, I am.”
—Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

“In spite of everything, I still believe people are really good at heart.”
—Anne Frank, The Diary of Anne Frank

“How wild it was, to let it be.”
—Cheryl Strayed, Wild

“At the still point, there the dance is.”
—T. S. Eliot, “Four Quartets”

Source: http://www.buzzfeed.com/jenniferschaffer/i-am-i-am-i-am?fb_action_ids=10152429734116073&fb_action_types=og.comments

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What you should know about FAST GOALS and UNREACHABLE GOALS

Hello Friends,

It’s a nice wet morning here in Chesapeake, VA.  The perfect atmosphere for writing a blog while in a relaxed state 🙂 This topic is something that I’ve been thinking about the past few days.

GOALS ARE NOT MEANT TO BE ACCOMPLISHED FAST

Please take a moment to hear me out before you disagree.

I love motivation and things that motivate us as humans.  Goals inspire people that they can do better and work harder to achieve just about anything they want. Nike puts out some great motivational quotes, hundreds if not thousands of books are written about motivation, and colleges literally proclaim that if you get a degree your field of choice is handed to you.

nike5

The reality is, that sometimes goals do the opposite of motivating us. Once a person makes a goal, the pressure is on. Often, a time limit is set and the feeling of failure quickly proceeds if the goal is not reached.  This can lead to a person throwing up their hands and going “This is not fair. Why can everyone else get there but I can’t?”

My friends, let me answer this for you.  In my opinion, goals are NOT meant to be met fast.  People that climb mountains, lost tons of weight, and achieved a high paying career had to work very hard to get there.  Harder than the average person can probably even relate too.  Giving yourself a short deadline to meet a goal fast is recipe for absolute disaster. I can’t tell you how many goals I have made, added a deadline, and given up on when that date came because my results were not as I had planned in my mind.

This picture below is not of me but it’s how I used to view weight loss.  I would say in 6 months I will lose 40 pounds. Not only would I expect to lose that amount of weight but I would also expect results like below.  Who knew, that NEVER happened!!!

before and after

So now, after many failures, I have a different outlook on goals.

THEY ARE NOT MEANT TO BE ACHIEVED FAST

Give yourself time. Keep a notebook and record your progress. If writing down negative progress feels defeating then don’t do it. As long as you stay focussed and realize that tomorrow is a new day. Sometimes, just having a notebook full of positive progress is what is needed to be inspired.  Reading, last week I was 5 pounds less than I am today so F*CK I’m going to go eat a bag of chips now because I feel depressed. DOES THAT REALLY HELP ANYTHING??? I read a quote the other day that said “No matter how slow you run, you are lapping everyone on the couch.”  Remember that, it’s really the truth!   If you have a realistic goal and want to achieve it really bad, love yourself enough to give your body, mind, and soul time to adapt to the changes.

stars

Now lets discuss reaching for the stars (literally).

UNREACHABLE GOALS

Before deciding and implementing a plan of action to reach your goal, please  take the time to go to the $1 store. You need to buy a spiral notebook and a pack of pens if they cannot be found in your house.

notebook pens

This $2 investment could literally save years of your life from being lost.  After getting together your supplies, sit down in a QUIET area where you feel relaxed. This could mean the beach, library, man cave, other… Turn off all TV’s , iPhone’s, ipads, ipods, kindles, computers, children’s toys, etc.

WRITE DOWN YOUR GOAL

then

 ASKING & ANSWER THE QUESTIONS:

-Why do I want to reach this goal?

-Is this goal realistic to my lifestyle?

-What will I have to sacrifice getting this goal or once I achieve it?

-Yes, I may be making a lot more money but will I be happy?

-Putting aside what everyone else is doing, why do “I” want to reach this goal?

-Do I have a good support network?

-Have I done enough research on the goal to know what must be obtained to reach it?

-Do I have the resources to reach my goal?

-Does money need to be invested to reach my goal?

-If I need a jump-start of self-confidence are there other ways of going about achieving this than setting a goal? (such as taking an art or photography class)

  After filling out all of these questions you may realize that you had the wrong goal, your goal was unrealistic, or that the goal is not really what you wanted in the first place.  If this happens, just make a new goal that fits what you are looking for better.  I do not think it’s unrealistic to go after something you passionately love. People will do the best in careers in which they feel happy.  Though these jobs may feel few and far between, remember to consider the fact that a vast majority go after positions in which they feel will be raking in the dough eventually.  I’m sure many successful people feel like they literally witnessed their happiness commit suicide out of their office window.

I will end with a true story about myself and a goal that I achieved without a sense of accomplishment. It was the wrong goal but a good learning experience. I hope I have helped you reevaluate your life a little better today. I’m only RECENTLY learning about how to look at life and make different decisions. It’s taken me a lot of falls to realize what it takes to make that first step.

owl 3

When I was around 21 years old I got it into my mind that I wanted to be a CNA (Certified Nursing Assistant).  I felt that this career goal would lead me to feeling accomplished, successful, and richer. Granted, CNA’s don’t make that much (for anyone wondering) but it’s a good step in the right direction to becoming a Nurse. I paid for this course, purchased expensive scrubs, and made good grades. I took the final exam and I believe made in the high 90’s! I was so excited that I called my best friend back home and told her the news.  I’d be lying if I said in this moment I was not happy. However, this happiness was short-lived when reality hit that I had to take the  state certification. I can give you 1000 reasons why I did not pursue going in there and doing it within the next several months.  The main one though was that I just did not want it bad enough. I had GOOD reasons for choosing a CNA degree as a goal. However, they were not the right ones.  Money and a stable career were not enough to motivate me to become state certified.  I knew that being happy was not in the equation. I had never taken time to pull out a notebook and ask myself the right questions before I went for that CNA goal. A lot of time, effort, and money would have been saved if I had taken just 30 minutes to calmly and quietly think about what I was doing.

College Spring Semester Update

I cannot believe I managed to pass with all A’s this past spring semester. For those that know me, they might roll their eyes because they figured I would. However, this semester has been incredibly challenging. Much more so than previous ones.  I was sick January-March and had to go to the doctor I believe 4-5 times. I even made a trip to the hospital for a reaction to a medication they gave me. The Dr.s had a very hard time figuring out what was in fact wrong with me.  While I was coughing up blood and crying from the sheer misery of that whole ordeal I managed to stay in school and keep my job. My courses were: Intro to Lit, World Lit, Computer, and Stress Management.  I’ve gotten to a point where I realize that very few things about college feel pleasurable (at least for myself).  I will be obtaining my Associates of Science in Social Sciences this summer and I’m telling you, I’ve never worked harder for something in my entire life.  This two-year degree turned into about a 6 year degree. Moving around, being thrown out, being left, etc, is what caused the major delay.  I never gave up though and even when I said I wanted too-I never dropped out.

My name is Jenny and I will be 25 years old when I obtain  my Associates degree. Those words feel really hard to say. However, if I look at it from the standpoint of-I can still get my Masters Degree before I’m 30- things don’t look so bad. A lot of times it’s just the angle at which we are turning our heads to observe our lives that is off. Don’t get me wrong, I have days where I feel completely defeated, behind, and embarrassed.  I will break down on my way home occasionally from the sheer exhaustion of life and trying.  Especially in moments where I witness people getting opportunities that were never awarded to me.

I once read a quote though that said “God would not give us our life if He did not think we could handle it.”  Also, one of Eleanor Roosevelt’s comes to mind:  “Women are like tea bags, they don’t realize how strong they are until they are in hot water.”  Without forgetting Helen Keller’s beautiful quote of “We can’t do everything, but we can do something.”

The most important thing in life is that we TRY. That is anything and everything that should be expected of a person.

My husband told me alst night that I was like the turtle in the race of  The Tortoise and the Hare.  That turtle may have crossed the finish line slowly but the most important thing is that he crossed it.

If anyone is interested in reading the story The Tortoise and the Hare it’s located at  >>>> Childhood Reading

tortoise

Working for Myself

“I’ve worked hard for other people but I’ve never worked hard for myself.” -Winner of Project Runway 2013

This quote really hits home because I have been serving people my entire life.  Without going into extreme detail, when you serve different families for years as a nanny, you begin to feel like a decorative piece of furniture in their squeaky clean & stylish houses. Walking through neighborhood after neighborhood of perfectly cut grass and gingerbread castles with $10 shoes on feels embarrassing deep down. The whisper in the wind says that I am only there because I know someone who lives on that neatly ironed street. I’ve been lucky to work for a few amazing families that have truly been good experiences. I’m not knocking the people specifically that I’ve worked for. My point is that we come from different worlds and that serving in a foreign world is really hard.

I work my ass off and can’t afford things for myself. I’m talking socks, new shoes, a haircut-the list goes on. Yet, working for families (especially good ones) is equivalent to being trapped in a wash machine. I have the same routine, every day, and regardless what happens to me financially or emotionally..stopping does not seem to be an option. I convince myself that the family depends on me and needs me to function. Being depended on is flattering and almost addicting. It’s also incredibly exhausting to have so much responsibility day in and day out. Questions go through my head like how can I leave? I take care of their child. What would they do without me?..

The answer to this is : exactly what they did before me. They will figure it out. The child will, in all reality, never remember me and yet still grow up happy and healthy.

Meanwhile, I have to figure my life out. Always being concerned with money, I’ve never really put myself first.  I’m at a point in my life at 25 years old where I feel like I’ve earned the right to be selfish for once.   Maybe it just feels like being selfish though…it could quite possibly be just feeling like a human that matters.   I need to make a public declaration that the family I am currently with will be my last family to nanny for. As soon as we move out-of-state it’s time to find something (anything) else. It’s time to say goodbye to the only profession that I feel truly confidant in. I need to do this for me. So that I can start working for myself. Doing God knows what. All I know is that I want it to make me feel:

 happy. comfortable. satisfied. secure. motivated. energetic.confidant. worthy. accomplished. talented. amazing. beautiful.

It’s taken me over 10 years to realize that none of those words, for me, coincide with childcare.

 lovely